Boundaries

Last Tuesday we talked about the different types of boundaries in a family. There are three types of boundaries and they are, rigid, clear and diffused. I began to think about these types of boundaries in my own family. I believe that my parents have a clear boundary set between them and my siblings and I. They always get one another's opinions when asked a questions by one of their children. They also support each other in a decision. I know that if I went to my mother and asked her something and she said no, I would get the same answer if went to my dad. They sometimes have misunderstandings but they always work together to work it out. I have never felt like there is a divide between them.

Actions and Attitudes

Elder David A. Bendar, has said "We are to act and not simply be acted upon". And yet our actions can effect the actions, and to some extent the attitudes of others. The way I act can influence the behaviors of my siblings for good or ill. After discussing the different family models in class Tuesday, I began to reflect on my part in those different models, particularly the systems model. I started to think back on the times where I see could how when my attitude changed from a negative to a positive, my siblings' attitudes seemed to change as well. I then remembered all the times when my attitude stayed negative and my siblings picked up on that and sometimes adopted the same mindset. I wish now that I had tried harder to be more positive from the beginning. 

Myths

After reading the required pages in my textbook, I began to think about the myths being discussed. The myths about love, marriage and cohabitation especially. I wonder if some teenagers have heard some of these myths told and have taken them as fact. What an impact that could have on their lives, if someone doesn't correct the infractions. In my adolescent development class, we discussed a case of a fourteen year old girl who married a twenty-two year old after getting pregnant with his child. The state they lived in labeled it as rape, but the couple said that it was "true" love.  If teenagers believe that that feeling of "love" will last forever or that most marriages end in divorce and that cohabitating before marriage will help decrease the risk of  a divorce then someone needs to tell them otherwise.  I think that if high schoolers had a class on family relations, one that focused mostly on dispelling myths about love, the risks of marriage and cohabitation, that maybe we could see a decrease in issues like teen pregnancy, and cohabitation.  It is also possible that there will be no change, but I think that it is worth a shot!